Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Fuckin' life
So things have been much the same as they have been...shitty. I feel used, alone again...mostly used I guess. The person I was involved in, in a strictly physical way, had started avoiding me and treating more like shit than usual, and then they started eluding to the fact that he had met someone and like, fallen madly in love or something. I am just really confused right now about his sudden change in perspective, but the one thing I do know is that I cannot be involved with this person anymore. He claims to love and support all of his friends, and to want to share all of his warm fuzzy emotions with the rest of the world, but can't bother to respond to me when I ask him the simple question of what has changed...do you just not want to sleep with me anymore? Or perhaps you really did meet someone new? Simple, easy questions to answer right? One would think. And I know we didn't have a legitimate relationship and he doesn't "owe" me anything, but out of simple respect and regard for my feelings and my ability to MOVE THE FUCK ON...I really would have liked to know what happened. But alas, he is not speaking to me at the moment, so I guess the only closure I am going to get is that which I give to myself. I honestly am happy for him if he met someone and fell in love or whatever, because I really didn't have any future with him whatsoever, but I really would have appreciated the common decency of a heads up or something. The only thing I can do now is just accept it as reality. I am still a good person and I will meet someone else. Everything just kind of sucks right now.
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